These days, we're hearing more and more about kids having behavioral problems, including defiance -- sometimes labelled as Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD). A defiant child or teen may be at higher risk of developing an addiction than other kids, simply because they refuse to play by the rules.
The stress they put on their parents may also increase the risk of the parents developing or worsening their own addictions, in an unhealthy attempt to cope.
If any of this is sounding familar, what should you do as a parent?
First, make sure you are following my ten tips for preventing addiction in kids. And if your teen is binge drinking, follow my tips for dealing with a drunk son and dealing with a drunk daughter.
Second, consult a good self-help book to make sure you are sending your child the right messages -- messages that they will respond to in the way you want. Two books I recommend to the parents of defiant kids are Your Defiant Child and Your Defiant Teen. Choose whichever fits the age of your child.
Third, deal with your own unresolved issues and address your own addictive behaviors, and any other emotional problems you have. Take care not to let the stress of the situation take over and become emotionally or physically abusive towards your child.
The worst-case scenario is for a defiant child and a frazzled parent to become violent with each other. Make sure you get help -- talk to your doctor or social services -- before it reaches this point in your family.
